In which we discuss "Hero"

Once upon a time, I was going to Pizza Hut with David. I don't know when it was and I don't remember anything about this trip except that we were listening to Superchic[k] and he was talking to me. Suddenly, the song "Hero" started to play. I had heard the song before, but I had never really listened to it before. Halfway through the song I noticed what the words were saying and I turned my attention to the song, completely amazed by its message. When the song was done, I was sitting there, silent, spellbound, pondering the meaning of the song. Finally, Dave said, "Mari Jo, are you listening to me?" Startled, I pulled my attention back to what had been going on and replied, "I'm sorry. Dave, that song is amazing!"

Hero
No one sits with him, he doesn’t fit in
But we feel like we do when we make fun of him
Cause you want to belong do you go along
Cause his pain is the price paid for you to belong
It’s not like we hate him or want him to die
But maybe he goes home and thinks suicide
Or he comes back to school with a gun at his side
And a kindness from you might have saved his life

(Chorus)
Heroes are made when you make a choice
You could be a hero
Heroes do what’s right
You could be a hero
You might save a life
You could be a hero, You could join the fight
For what’s right for what’s right for what’s right

No one talks to her, she feels so alone
She’s in too much pain to survive on her own
The hurt she can’t handle overflows to a knife
She writes on her arm, wants to give up her life
Each day she goes on is a day that she is brave,
Fighting the lie that giving up is the way,
Each moment of courage her own life she saves
When she throws out the pills a hero is made

[Chorus]

No one talks to him about how he lives
He thinks that the choices he makes are just his
Doesn’t know he’s a leader with the way he behaves
And others will follow the choices he’s made
He lives on the edge, he’s old enough to decide
His brother who wants to be him is just nine
He can do what he wants because it’s his right
The choices he makes change a nine year old’s life

[Chorus]

Little Mikey D was in the one class
Who everyday got brutally harassed
This went on for years
Until he decided that never again
Would he shed another tear
So he walked through the door
Grabbed the 4-4 out of his father's dresser drawer
And said I can't take life no more
And like that life can be lost
But this ain't even about that
All of us just sat back
And watch it happen
Thinkin' it's not our responsibility
To solve a problem that isn’t even about me
This is our problem
This is just one of the daily scenarios
Which we choose to close our eyes
Instead of doing the right thing
If we make a choice
And be the voice
For those who won't speak up for themselves
How may lives would be saved, changed, and rearranged
Now it's our time to pick a side
So don't keep walking by
Don't wanna intervene
Cause you just wanna exist and never be seen
So let's wake up
Change the world
Our time is now

[Chorus]

This song became one of my favorites. One may read those words and think "how depressing!" I have to agree -- it is depressing. But it's so true! I have gone through some pretty rotten things in my life. I was belittled and ridiculed a lot when I was growing up. I thought that going somewhere else would make it better. But it didn't. It only got worse. People at school found out that people at home didn't want me and they treated me even worse. It's almost as if they believe that if you didn't have a perfect life growing up, then you don't deserve to have a life at all once you get away from your imperfect past. It's so sad. And it really never goes away. The song Hero is one that everyone should ponder. One may think that his or her words or actions won't make such a big impact on someone. There's a verse in Proverbs that says "Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or fruit - you choose" (Prov. 18:21, The Message translation). Words make a huge impact on the people who hear them. The tongue literally holds the power of death and life.

Not only is a person's life impacted by what others say, but it is also impacted by how other's behave. Maybe you don't like someone -- but did you ever stop to think about how the way you treat that person makes them feel? They feel alone. They feel empty. They feel defective. They begin to think that since everyone treats them horribly, it must mean that they aren't worthy of life. How do I know this? I've been there. My first couple of years in college were rough. If just one person had come to me and said, "You ARE special. You ARE cool. You ARE worthy enough to go on living" it would have been so much better. But no one did. It hurts so much. You want to die every day.

I wrote this to my grandmother earlier this Summer:
Knowing that you aren't important is indescribably painful and leaves you feeling empty beyond words. I think I understand the ghetto and why they exist. Destructive behaviors begin as a result of rejection. In an effort to numb the pain and fill the emptiness, the poor souls turn to drugs, alcohol and violence. Drugs and alcohol only leave them more empty, in more pain, and more alone. Violence ultimately leads to more empty, hurting people when the lives of loved ones are taken. They go to bed with strangers, thinking that by doing so, the pain and emptiness will go away. But they only create more emptiness and more pain -- in their own lives and in the lives of the children that they didn't want in the first place. They begin to abuse themselves -- either over-eating or starving themselves. They eat to comfort themselves. They starve themselves thinking that if they're small, they'll be accepted. When it doesn't work, they begin to think that everything is completely out of control, and it's never going to get better. They have nothing to lose. They're completely incapable of feeling anything but emotional pain and emptiness. They become frantic in their need to feel. They cut themselves. They put themselves in physically painful situations. It hurts -- but at last they can feel. Even that ends up being empty for them. They come to a point where they look at where they are, why they're there, and what could be done to control the situation. It ends in their death. They see how they've failed at everything they've tried, and they don't see the point of going on. They make a plan. Overdose . . . Hanging . . . Shooting . . . Cutting their wrists . . . In the end, they die. They are just as empty as they ever were.

It's something I wish I didn't understand. But perhaps because I DO understand, I can help those who hurt. Those who have been rejected. Those who have been scorned and ridiculed. Maybe I can make someone else's life better and easier and worth living.

Won't you join me in being a hero?
~MK